So, this post isn’t exactly about sewing or crafting. But I felt it was necessary because, not only are we 13 days into the new year, we’re 13 days into a new decade! It really got me thinking about all I’ve learned and all that’s happened in the last 10 years. Thinking back, 10 years ago feels more like another life time ago!!
For many different reasons, I feel I have not been able to fully step into being myself. As I’m sure it’s been for everyone, there were a lot of ups and downs. It’s definitely safe to say that life was very different ten years ago!
So much has been gained- ten years ago, I didn’t know how to sew! or even cook (properly anyway)! I was a financially struggling student with a young daughter and one on the way.
And there were also deep losses. My heart aches when I think about those who have left us this past decade.
Because of all these changes, I have learned a lot and I wanted to share some of the things I’ve learned. Maybe some of you have learned the same lessons or are in the process of learning the same lessons. Or are learning them a second or third time (as I am all too familiar with).
So, below, I created a list of the top 10 things I’ve learned between 2010 and now. Below each one, I included a quote that I think captures what I’m trying to say better than I could have said it (some of them have 2 quotes because I couldn’t pick one).
Take ownership of your intentions- don’t make decisions that create negative consequences for yourself and then play the victim.
What I know for sure is that whatever your situation is right now, you have played a major role in setting it up. It is you who have created your circumstances. With every experience, you alone are painting your own canvas, thought by thought, choice by choice. And beneath each of those thoughts and choices lies your deepest intention. If you are feeling stuck in your life and want to move forward, start by examining your past motivations.Oprah Winfrey
Don’t bend and sway to please others. Make decisions by, first, asking yourself what you believe in and what you want. Trust this completely!
“One of the lessons that I grew up with was to always stay true to yourself and never let what somebody else says distract you from your goals.”Michelle Obama
â€œThereâ€™s nothing worse than betraying yourself.â€Oprah Winfrey
There is always something to be learned- even when bad things happen. These lessons can be powerful!
â€œWhen we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways–either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength.â€Dalai Lama XIV
â€œThere is not one experience, no matter how devastating, no matter how tortuous it may appear to have been, there is nothing thatâ€™s ever wasted. Everything that is happening to you is being drawn into your life as a means to help you evolve into who you were really meant to be here on Earth. Itâ€™s not the thing that matters, itâ€™s what that thing opens within you”.Oprah Winfrey
The present moment is the only thing. We can’t change the past and the future doesn’t exist yet.
All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry – all forms of fear – are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of non forgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.â€â€• Eckhart Tolle
â€œAs soon as you honor the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve, and life begins to flow with joy and ease. When you act out the present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care, and love – even the most simple action.â€Eckhart Tolle
Forgiveness is life!
â€œThere is a distinction between forgiveness and simply allowing others’ wrong doing. Sometimes people misunderstand and think forgiveness means you accept or approve of others’ wrong doing. No, this is not the case. We must make an important distinction. The actor and the action, or the person and what he has done. Where the wrong action is concerned, it may be necessary to take appropriate counter-action to stop it. Toward the actor or the person, however, you can choose not to develop anger or hatred.â€”Dalai Lama
Remember to be grateful.
Gratitude is its own energy field. When you acknowledge and are grateful for whatever you have, it allows more to be drawn to you and changes the way you experience life. Grace is transformative. The more grateful you are, the more grace mirrors the gratitude that you have.Oprah
Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.â€The Dalai Lama
Accept what is, instead of resisting it or wishing things were different. This will drastically change your life.
â€œIf a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it’s not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.â€The Dalai Lama
To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.â€Eckhart Tolle
Stillness/meditation provides the space we need to truly feel content and present.
â€œMeditative practice allows us to quiet the distracting thoughts and feelings so that we can perceive reality, and respond to it more skillfully. The ability to be present in each moment is nothing more and nothing less than the ability to accept the vulnerability, discomfort, and anxiety of everyday life.Dalai Lama
We don’t need to have it all figured out! In reality, no one has it all figured out. Taking everything step by step, day by day, is really all we can do- and that’s not a bad thing!
â€œthere is no reason to constantly attempt to figure everything outâ€Michael A. Singer
We are in charge of our own happiness or joy– regardless of what is happening around us.
True happiness comes from having a sense of inner peace and contentment, which in turn must be achieved by cultivating altruism, love, and compassion, and by eliminating anger, selfishness, and greed.Dalai Lama
â€œWe create most of our suffering, so it should be logical that we also have the ability to create more joy. It simply depends on the attitudes, the perspectives, and the reactions we bring to situations and to our relationships with other people. When it comes to personal happiness there is a lot that we as individuals can do.â€ â€¢â€Dalai Lama
â€™Materialistic values cannot give us peace of mind. So we really need to focus on our inner values, our true humanity. Only this way can we have peace of mindâ€”and more peace in our world. A lot of the problems we are facing are our own creation, like war and violence. Unlike a natural disaster, these problems are created by humans ourselves.â€™â€™Dalai Lama
So, I look forward to this new decade! Even though whatever this new decade has in store is still unknown, I know it’s greatness, growth and newness! Thanks for reading!